Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Learning computer science

To be stupid, and selfish, and to have good health are the three requirements for happiness; though if stupidity is lacking, the others are useless.
- Gustave Flaubert


At fourteen years of age I had to learn history, geography and sanskrit in my tenth standard to get computers in my junior college.

In my junior college I had to learn chemistry and physics to get computer engineering in my senior college.

Now in my senior college I am memorising webster's dictionary so that I can do research in computer science.

If extrapolation were to be done, the next biggest challenges before becoming a computer scientist would be ballet dancing, surrealist painting and outerspace exploration to name a few. There's a long road ahead and I doubt if I possess a large enough appetite for stupidity and banality to take me all the way through but then, who cares. I still get to read my novels and watch my cartoons, so no complaints.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Neomodernism

Three Action Kamen Underwears for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Action Kamen Underwear to rule them all, One Action Kamen Underwear to find them,
One Action Kamen Underwear to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

Three Milki Bar Choos for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Milki Bar Choo to rule them all, One Milki Bar Choo to find them,
One Milki Bar Choo to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

Three Kung Fu Pandas for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Kung Fu Panda to rule them all, One Kung Fu Panda to find them,
One Kung Fu Panda to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

Three
Shamsher Sikandar Chuddie Badis for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One
Shamsher Sikandar Chuddie Badi to rule them all, One
Shamsher Sikandar Chuddie Badi to find them,
One
Shamsher Sikandar Chuddie Badi to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

I even thought of rewriting the whole lotr but it took more than a minute and I lost interest.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

A dry post

This is a clear conspiracy against me. I am reading the news about monsoon reaching the whole of India, except kanpur.

I am suspecting this year they shifted kanpur to the north of himalayas. It seems to be the only reasonable explanation. Varun said it was raining in hongkong. They must have swapped kanpur with hongkong, how else can they have rain in a chinese city.

Right now this place is more dry than mouse's lecture on William the Conqueror. After being listed as the most polluted city in the guinness book of records kanpur is now heading for driest city that has been swapped with another chinese city. People of kanpur as simply insatiable.

And in such dire circumstances the intrepid me has started memorising the seemingly interminable list of words and their meanings. Though it might seem unintelligible to a layman as to how a person can be judged from his ability to figure antonyms and fill in the blanks, but the ways of the wise are difficult to fathom. A recent study conducted by ets has shown that there is a correlation of 0.9 between the most successful people in this world and those who are extremely efficient at finding antonyms and fill in the blanks.[citation needed]

Now, if I were you, you would be wondering how can someone survive in such vile conditions. Well it is mostly small things that give you hope. Like recently I discovered that firefox address bar is called awesome bar and that there is a sequel to alice in wonderland.

As bilbo used to say, the road goes on and on, so better take a bicycle along with you and it is monsoon so a raincoat is also advisable, unless you reside in kanpur.